As a gift for my soon-to-be married best friend, I thought that along with great gifts, I’d give her some advice, advice on how to make her soon-to-be husband love her more. Here’s what I have so far:
1. Compare him to your friend’s husband or, better yet, to husbands of your favorite movie stars.
2. Assume he can read your mind. This works every time.
3. Continue asking him what’s on his mind when he says “nothing”
4. Force him to talk about his inner feelings and childhood inadequacies.
5. Buy him a nice European shoulder bag, and ask him to wear it if he is “man enough.”
6. Buy him a sweatshirt that says “I love my wife more than my mother.”
7. Convince him that his real friends are low life, dirt bags and that he should, instead, only spend time with you and your friends’ husbands.
8. Go on daily shopping sprees and conceal the goodies in the trunk of your car.
9. Make fun of him for refusing to ask for directions when lost on the highway.
10. Disregard his need for privacy. You’re married. Married individuals need privacy and their own lives? What?! Where’d you hear that nonsense.
Any other tips that I should add to the list? I really want this to be a special gift for her.
About Jessica Jessica (@jessicafhinton)
Jessica F. Hinton is a writer, blogger, and hobbyist photographer living in the DC metropolitan area with her husband and two children. Her writings have appeared in various places on- and off-line, such as The Huffington Post, Babble, BlogHer, The African American Review, Early Mama, Tots 2 Tweens, and Baltimore's Child. She is a senior editor at Baby Gizmo and writes unedited at her other blog, http://shortlittlebits.com.
{ 11 comments… read them below or add one }
Haha!! Perfect advice, I do all of those things. Wait, I'm not supposed to, right? Hehe;)
Oh goody, I'm doing everything RIGHT! I try so hard to be the perfect wife!
this is great!! I absolutely love it!!!
Drive his car on a Sunday and leave the gas tank on empty so when he asks did yoiu put gas in it when he wakes up late Monday morning you can bat your eyelashes and say no!
I'm not married yet buuuut…..
Ask him for lunch and gas money even though you have 40 dollars in your wallet and plenty of money in the bank! :-p
I have to be honest when I say If anyone follows this advise your husband will for SURE cheat on you 100% sorry girls you must be in denial in your relationships all of this advise is literally the oppisate of what a woman should do that’s just my opinion
the best advice, just be yourself. your husband already loves you for who you are.
You are not suppose to do ANY of that! You will definitely drive him nuts!
The most rubbish n disgusting advice i have ever read. This things will turn him off only. So cheap advice. how can u hurt his son mind by buying a T shirt writtrn he dont love his mom. he he do the same to u will u agree? Increaing love is related to make urself more mature not a bitch. most of the points here are cheap.
ladies dont follow these advice. it will turn him off only n will make him hate u more.
Thanks
How can you advice a woman to tell her husband that his friends are dirt bags and he should spend all his time on you and your married friends husband????? Dear editor of this piece of shit. i think u r in a torn up marriage and this was the way you went that lead to it. u had ur life b4 u met ur husband and also your husband had his life too so because he is married tou he should throw away his life for u thats IMPOSSIBLEEEE. r u a teenager dat ull get him the sweat shirt with such writings??? if he loves u he does. it doesnt take a sweat shirt writings to put the love there. GOSH this is the worse peice of trash i have seen in a long time
You guys are so hilarious! This article is a joke! You know ha-ha!! The author is being sarcastic, hence why she is so dramatic in her ‘suggestions’! Look at you all, looking so silly and telling Woman ‘not to follow this advice’! You don’t say! I hope the author had a giggle out of you like I did. We dont need to pointing out the obvious, being so damn up tight and ruining a humorous article!