I should want to attend my high school’s 10-year class reunion. I should want to see who’s gotten fat, married, divorced, who’s bald and what not (that’s what people go to these things for, right? No?).
I should want to make an “entrance,” kind of like the ones in movies, done through foil streamers, in a stunning little black number and (real) diamonds to show just how far I’ve made it in life. Ha.
I should want to reflect on my high school experience and should want to share with the people that I haven’t bothered (or cared) to talk to (at least directly) in 10 years all the good that’s happened to me since high school.
I should. But, I really, really don’t.
How did I get here?
I always imagined as a child in watching 90s movies featuring the drama that could take place at high school reunions that I’d look forward to my reunion. I’d imagined that I’d be excited to see everyone and show everyone the “new me.”
But now that I’m in the situation to attend my own high school’s reunion (10 year class reunion. Yeah. It’s been that long.), my thoughts have changed.
I really, really have no desire to attend,” I told a friend who is planning the reunion. And added that I “don’t have a reason to.”
She looked at me surprised, heartbroken almost and said, “But wasn’t high school the best time of your life?”
I nearly choked on my spit. I wanted to laugh then, but didn’t because it seemed insensitive. Instead I just smiled and said, “Not really. I’ve changed a lot since high school, I’m not that person, and my best days have happened after high school.”
“Really?” she said, disappointed in me it seemed for daring to live after 18. “I loved high school. It was the height of my life,” she said.
“It was?” I said and stopped there (and adjusted my crooked facial expression) in an effort to, again, not appear insensitive.
“Yeah,” she said. “Plus, I really want to see everyone again and re-live some old memories.”
Not knowing how to respond to the whole “high school was the height of my life” thing, I didn’t. I said something again about already keeping in touch with everyone I care about and ended by saying that I’d try to “make it,” but didn’t think I could.
I’m not going to make it.
High School Reunions
In reflecting on my desire to not attend, I started thinking about how their meaning has changed in the past decade. I mean, with Facebook, it seems like that whole element of surprise or drama of not knowing for years and then finding out in a gym auditorium is gone. (For better and mostly worse) I’m “friends” with nearly everyone in my class on Facebook, so everyone knows I have a baby, that I’m married, that my dad died in 2009, that I started and stopped a PhD program. They know everything, pretty much? So, what more can I share (that I would want to share)?
Or, maybe I’m wrong. And missing the point of these things, these reunions.
Did you attend (or do you plan to attend) your high school’s class reunion. Why or why not? Am I right that Facebook and other social networking sites have changed things?