I’ve read some posts recently around the blogosphere asking, perhaps, rhetorically, “why the silence among blog readers?” “Why are readers commenting less on my blog?” “Why are my stats going down?”
As a blogger and blog reader of two years, I can say that these silences are normal, par for the course in the life cycle of blogging communities. Among bloggers who are also moms, it happens in the Spring and the Summer months because the change in seasons often leads, in healthy adults, to a condition called “get-offline-ism.” That’s what happened to me last year.
This year, I am not really suffering from “get-offline-ism. This year, my silence can be explained by a lot of other circumstantial things that are all happening at once in my life.
My number one reason is this little girl.
She’s teething, waking five times a night. FIVE TIMES A NIGHT! And though she sleeps early in the evening, around 7, she also wakes up early, around 6 AM.
My usual blogging routine is to read, write, comment at night, but with her teething, balding, and mastering new skills like the army crawl, I have been going to bed too early to do anything but read two chapters of a book, twitter-stalk, and check my email. And I refuse to wake up any earlier than she does, so there you have it.
Oh, and did I mention I have a toddler? Well, I have a toddler/artist.
She’s based on the East Coast and specializes in variety of mediums, namely finger paints and construction paper. Here’s some of her most recent works that didn’t make it in the trash.
(In case you’re wondering, the paint is stored in an cut out piece of an egg carton. If you haven’t done that before, you should! It’s awesome for toddlers.)
She’s got talent, right?
Oh, and she is now 95% potty trained (only uses a diaper at night) and very active and, might I add, still sleeping through the night in her own bed. Woo hooo!
Along with the two of them, I’ve been doing new things, too, things that have taken me offline.
I’ve been been reading…books, you know those things you actually hold and turn pages? Yeah. Those. And, I’m loving it. I just finished Girl Land by Caitlin Flanagan and now I’m on to A Beginner’s Goodbye by Anne Tyler.
I started Yoga Meltdown, too, so that takes up 30 minutes of my day, each day.
Also I’ve been Spring Cleaning. I cleaned out three closets last week and my pantry and took care of other very unglamorous, but very gratifying household tasks that made me feel like I did something worthy of a ribbon… the “Finally Got It Done” ribbon.
So life has been full recently, but, lovely and that’s why I’ve been mostly silent.
You believe me, right?
We’re also working on sharing over here. Less, “No, mine!” from my toddler and more offerings of apples and toys to her baby sister and others without violence or a tantrum.
***
*This is week 17 in my 52 photos challenge. Also, if you haven’t already, do enter my giveaway for a $50 Visa Gift Card! It’s legit and you really can win!
About Jessica Jessica (@jessicafhinton)
Jessica F. Hinton is a writer, blogger, and hobbyist photographer living in the DC metropolitan area with her husband and two children. Her writings have appeared in various places on- and off-line, such as The Huffington Post, Babble, BlogHer, The African American Review, Early Mama, Tots 2 Tweens, and Baltimore's Child. She is a senior editor at Baby Gizmo and writes unedited at her other blog, http://shortlittlebits.com.
{ 24 comments… read them below or add one }
Sounds like you have a full plate, and totally understandable. Kids are only this age once, we should enjoy them as much as possible! Well, except for the waking up 5x/ night
You’re exactly right! I truly am enjoying this time and feel as though I’ve finally settled into a new groove that is working. Once scrumplet comes, you’ll know what I mean when I say that each week is about learning and re-learning what works, adjusting, and fixing things that aren’t working right. This week, I’ve adjusted, re-learned and it feels lovely!
“Kids are only this age once, we should enjoy them as much as possible!” So True! They are only tiny and needy for a short while. Well, I guess the neediness continues when they get older, but the actual things that they need will change.
Jessica, I totally relate to this post (as usual). I’m constantly trying to figure out ways to simplify things for me and my family. Laundry is a four-headed monster that I can never seem to defeat. Meal planning is one of the most helpful, efficient things to do and I never do it. I want my kids to be involved and exposed to so many things, but i also need to have time for me and my relationship and sleep and cleaning the house and of course WRITING! Honestly, If mama doesn’t get to write, then no one benefits from that.
Anyway, I understand totally and complete what it’s like. Btw, your little girls are so cute
Thank you, GG! And I’m glad you could relate! It is hard balancing it all. I think this week, my new lesson is that sometimes we, as parents, must learn to let go of some things in order for other things to flourish. This week, I let go of going on as many outings as usual. I’ve let go of blogging as much at night. I’ve been reading and we’ve been going places that are close enough for us to walk. And this has worked out well for us. Next week may be different. Next week, my writing deadlines may change. Their napping habits may change. There may be more laundry. But this week, this is what’s working. Thankfully.
I think we are living in parallel worlds, lol. My life is very similar, and it has been busy, busy, busy here. But I really need to start reading again – that has been on my to do list for quite some time now! I miss it.
Yes! Reading is so important, isn’t it? I think if you can, just go to the library, get one book and read half or a whole chapter each day. Do what you can, and forgive yourself for what you can’t. This is what’s been working for me. I just finished one book and feel so proud of myself!
I agree, your hands are full, but you know what, enjoy it (not the waking up part). This stage is challenging, but like Allison said, they are this age only once.
Very true! This phase shall pass soon enough! I’m enjoying all that I can enjoy of it, however, while I can!
Teething is no fun but almost fully potty trained is!
Exactly!! Nya is still wearing diapers at night, but during the day, she’s in underwear. And that’s awesome!
“Get offline-ism” is one of thee best phrases I’ve ever heard! I suffer from this all the time…actually, it’s my blog that suffers. It’s wonderful when you post and it’s clear in your silence that you are rocking being a mom and being good to yourself with books, yoga, and sleep.
Thank you, Christine! I just want to stay sane, that’s all. Yoga, books, and sleep are helping me do that right now and helping me be a better mom. Maybe not a better blogger, but that’s OK.
Sometimes I wish I can go back in time to when we stuck to the basics and yes, I wish I can go back to reading books! We do have to strike a balance between our online and offline lives, don’t we?
Yes! We really do! Before getting to this place, I was kind of feeling overwhelmed with it all and trying to make it all work at the same time. But, I realized, you can’t always make everything work at the same time. Sometimes, you have to let some things go and just enjoy other things. Thank you for your comment!
So cute! Yep, I think real life consumes all of us sometimes. And isn’t that the way it should be?
That is the way it should be! I must remind myself of this, often, whenever I begin to feel stressed about blogging and my social media life.
Ummm yes. You have a lot on your plate. Stay sane! Do what you’ve got to do!
Staying sane! Yes, that’s the goal! I like taking a break and doing other things. I love blogging, but I also love other things, too, you know?
So sorry about the five times a night! Ugh.
But hey at least you have a budding artist on your hands that can support you in old age. Of course, you’ve got quite a bit of time before that point! =)
Good point!! And, yes five times a night is not fun, but, you know, luckily, since writing this post, she has started to wake three times a night. It’s still a lot, but far better than five!
I love “get-off-line-ism”! That is always what I assume, during holidays and when the weather gets nice.
I do that too…it is physically hard for me to be at my computer for long stretches of time, especially when during my work season 100% of my work is done at the computer. So the iPad has helped, as I can sit back and relax in bed with it, but then for some reason I have trouble submitting comments on some blogs (like yours) via my iPad.
Good stuff can be done when you’re off line! I too have gone back to reading real, page turning books this year. I love it!
Yoga too!
Your pictures are beautiful. Kids’ art ALWAYS looks like true art to me, because it’s colorful and unhibited and honest.
I hope you get some sleep soon, and that the teething eases up…poor little girl!
Thank you, Cecilia! Last night, Annah only woke up three times! So that’s an improvement, right?? lol.
I think it’s important to get offline to remember that you do have passions, people, and loves to pursue offline, too. I also find that when I stay online too much, my writing suffers and focus wanes. So, getting offline is good for me! Yoga and books are my new food that I’m totally digging right now!
You sound very busy in the best of ways. Despite the multiple night wakings. Congrats on Nya being mostly potty-trained! We are so not there yet with Q, but that deserves its own post on my own blog.
And I’m woefully envious of your book reading. I keep telling myself that I need to buy some actual books soon! Reading on the Kindle just doesn’t feel the same, and I miss those pages. Good for you with the yoga too!
Thank you! Yes, the potty training feat was (and, is) awesome! I’m very happy about that! And even though I’m very tired with all the night wakings, I’m getting sleep when I can and enjoying this life.