How to Make Your Husband Love You More (Part 2)

by Jessica (@jessicafhinton) on July 25, 2012

I get a lot of traffic to this blog from a humorous post I wrote awhile back called, “How to Make Your Husband Love You More.”

Before you click on it, let me first say this, you know how you write something funny, but the title’s “how to” would suggest that it’s serious. But it’s really not serious, but people may think it is (or will be) if they don’t know you or read your blog and hate you, subsequently, for fooling them into clicking a link they were interested in for something other than a laugh?

Yeah.

That’s that post.

It’s a sarcastic, funny post naming 10 things that you really should not do to make your husband love you more.

Number one on the list? Compare him to your friend’s husband or, better yet, to husbands of your favorite movie stars. In case you’re wondering, that’s a joke. All 10 on that list are a joke.

How can you make your husband more? Really?

I don’t think you can make someone love you more. I mean, can you make yourself love someone more if you don’t already? I don’t think I could, and that’s why that post was a joke.

Seriously, you can’t make love happen in a marriage if it’s not already happening. You can do things to nurture yourself, your marriage, and do other things in the name of love, but if it (or love) is not there, then you can’t make it be there, you know? Or, at least that’s what I think after six years of marriage.

The thing that I think is really downplayed when you’re pregnant with your first child is just how much your marriage can change when you have a child. It’s downplayed that you will change, that your spouse will change, and that in your changing something happens in your marriage.

Marriages change after children, at least mine did.

Our love is different now, more grounded now, because, I think, children have given us a more beautiful lens from which to see our ourselves and our relationship with each other.

We love each other more now because we’ve braved parenting together. We are decidedly getting through it together. We want to make our marriage work, so we’re making it work.

That’s all. I’m off my soapbox. And for anyone here from Google, I can be genuinely funny sometimes. Really.

What do you think. Can you make your spouse love you more?

***
In case your wondering, today was a Clicking Series day, but due to a failing memory card that didn’t happen. Boo! I know. I know. But do check back tomorrow where I’ll be naming 11 habits of awesome photographers! Here’s one of the pictures from the post that did manage to make it on to my computer.

 Yeah. She’s covered in food, but so darn cute! So, will I see you tomorrow? Hmm? (blink blink) I really hope so!:-)

About Jessica

Jessica F. Hinton is a writer, blogger, and hobbyist photographer living in the DC metropolitan area with her husband and two children. Her writings have appeared in various places on- and off-line, such as The Huffington Post, Babble, BlogHer, The African American Review, Early Mama, Tots 2 Tweens, and Baltimore's Child. She is a senior editor at Baby Gizmo and writes unedited at her other blog, http://shortlittlebits.com.

{ 12 comments… read them below or add one }

Jessica July 25, 2012 at 5:17 pm

Jessica, she is freakin adorable! Also? I laughed out loud at your previous post. We definitely have the same sense of humor!

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Jessica July 26, 2012 at 8:13 am

lol. Thank you, Jessica! I’m glad I could make you laugh!! xo.

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Alison July 25, 2012 at 8:11 pm

I agree – marriage changes with the arrival of children. Now, you’re working at it for reasons other than you don’t want to be alone etc. Now you have small people you choose to bring into the world. Small people who love us and need us together.

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Jessica July 26, 2012 at 8:15 am

Oh, I agree! And it’s wonderful in that way. It’s wonderful how much substance and meaning our children can bring to our lives and our perspectives on our marital unions.

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jen July 25, 2012 at 8:35 pm

i love that post. so hilarious! And yes I’ll be back for more tomorrow!

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Jessica July 26, 2012 at 8:16 am

Yay! I look forward to seeing you!

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The Pepperrific Life July 25, 2012 at 10:01 pm

Love evolves with the passage of time. Both the happy and tough experiences make your love and marriage stronger. Change makes the marriage grow.
You’re right, you can’t possibly make anyone love you any more than he already does. Love is either present or absent.

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Jessica July 26, 2012 at 8:19 am

Yes! I hope when traffic comes to my blog on those search terms that they’ll read your comment, because you’re exactly right! I love the way you expressed that!

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Runnermom-jen July 27, 2012 at 10:18 am

Oh yeah, marriage DEFINITELY changes after kids come along…I had no idea how much it would change.
Love the picture…she’s gorgeous :)

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Jessica July 28, 2012 at 9:13 am

Thank you!! Yes, marriages do change. I had no idea either, but I think we’re better now then we were then. We have less time for each other now, but our relationship seems more solid now. It has more of a purpose, you know?

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Ruby @ Focus, Woman! July 30, 2012 at 3:37 am

But…but…but HOW CAN I MAKE MY HUSBAND LOVE ME MORE??? You didn’t tell me that!

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Jessica July 30, 2012 at 6:02 pm

LOL. I know so much Google searches will be me people asking this very question!

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